17 April 2014

Breathe In, Breathe Out

I just picked Zoey up from the vet where she's spent most of the day waiting for the ultrasound and then for the vet to get out of surgery to give me the results.

I'm still having a hard time catching my breath.  I'm sure the tears will come some time tonight.

Tears of joy.  Tears of relief.

My floofy-feline-furball therapy's ultrasound came back normal in every way, shape, and form.  It's possible that the test was wrong but Dr M is confident Zoey's okay.  We'll watch her with the new food for about 4-6 weeks.  If the blood comes back, we'll then look at a biopsy but he's feeling pretty confident she's okay.

Now I just need to settle down.  I've been wound tighter than a spring because of all the stress.  If I were a drinking person, I'd have a drink.

I'm not so I just need to figure out how to unwind effectively.  Deep breaths....  In, out.  In out.  Slowly.  Relax...

I need...  guava.  Mango?  Fruit.  Give me fresh fruit.

In...  Out...


Yep. That about covers it.  I've been a bundle of nerves for months and now with Zoey's health issues....

I'd noticed that over the years I was able to, if not overcome completely, get a handle on my anxiety issues.  I went years without an anxiety attack.  I thought, really thought I had put the anxiety issues behind me.

Nope.  I've noticed, especially in recent days thanks to the issues with Zoey, the anxiety has heightened.  Anxious habits that had gone away are now in the forefront.  I'm constantly worried that something bad will happen, constantly checking to make sure everything is okay--out of fear.  Absolute fear.

Take last night for example....  The Caboose had a couple friends sleep over in the back yard.  For some reason, the irrational part of my brain was convinced that they'd leave the door open and Zoey would escape.  They didn't.  She didn't.  Everything was good.

But yeah, when something bad happens, my fight or flight sense kicks into overdrive.  *heavy sigh*

Ya know, I understand that people don't "get" why I'm so attached to my animals.  I understand that there are those that think they're "just" an animal.  That's fine.  What bugs me, though, is how cold they are when they interact with me.  People, it's called empathy or compassion.  Don't criticize me.  Just be supportive.  And if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!!!!  Sorry.  I'm just...  sad that I have no emotional support through all of this.  One would think that an individual who claims to care or know me best would understand why I'm so upset.  Nope.  *sigh*  Of course it makes sense--since that's one of the reasons I'm so darn attached to my cats!
#TBT Z and angel kitty Turbo 2007

Anyway...  Zoey is actually at the vet this afternoon for her ultrasound.  Even though the Caboose and Keeks are home, it still feels empty without my floof-ball's presence.  It's only supposed to be for this afternoon.  And she'll come back with her tummy shaved.  Lucky Zee.

This bites.  It just bites.  I'm missing my girl.

16 April 2014

Dear Dover

I've had this itch to simplify lately.  I suppose it's because it's Spring and I've been bitten with the Spring Cleaning bug.  The other day it was my silverware drawer.  I guess it's not really silver so flatware drawer?

As I was sorting through my drawer, I was thinking about how long I've had my set.  My mom bought the set for me for either my birthday or Christmas in 1987.  She wanted me to have a good quality set and I chose Oneida's Dover.  Even though my set is over 26 years old, it looks like it's fresh and new.  As I stood there, I realized that if I had to choose all over again, I still would choose Dover.  How's that for sustainability and consistency in what I like?  *chuckle*

Thinking about having the same set of flatware for over 26 years caused me to reflect on how many different people that have actually eaten with them.  It's amazing to think that. and they still look pretty darn good!  Nice and ooh, shiny.  :)

Sadly, I'm missing a few pieces.  I think that when the nsdxh left, he took a place setting.  *grumble*  I asked all those years ago but he denied it.  I finally got around to ordering replacement pieces this past week.  I can't wait to get them.

I have every intention of continuing to use Dover for as long as I'm living.  Yeah, I like the pattern that much!  Dish patterns come and go, I think I'm on my fifth or sixth different pattern since I first was married all those years ago.  But Dover...  At least I found something I can stick with!

Random thought for the day.

15 April 2014

Today is NOT a Good Day for Electronics!

I discovered yesterday that my four year old printer decided to stop printing with black ink.  I tried everything I could (researching it online) but the black ink gave up the ghost.  I was told at Staples that having a printer last four years is exceptional--especially one that was bought on clearance for $80.

Then my internet crashed last night.  It was down for about 24 hours.  Neither the Caboose or I were happy about it but we survived.

After finally falling asleep, I woke up at a ridiculously early hour this morning to the sound of my phone chirping--like it does when I'm connecting it to the cord to charge it.  I looked over the side of my bed and discovered Keeks chewing on the cord.  Yup.  Clear through.  She's lucky she didn't get an electric shock!  But that meant a new phone charger for my five month old phone.  (I guess that's ancient in phone years.)  Ugh.

I fell back asleep only to be woken up by the vet calling with the report of Zoey's blood work.  Good news.  She's not diabetic.  Her liver is working perfectly.  Gosh, everything  was awesome!

Bad news is, her blood work was perfectly normal.

Because that's not what we wanted if there is something physiologically wrong with her other than the new food.  No, we wanted her thyroid to be out of whack.  Nope.  Normal.  That means more invasive testing to see if she has inflammatory bowel disease or even cancer.  I brought up my research about the BB food and asked the vet if we should wait.  He said no.  In his opinion, we should do the ultrasound ASAP.  The sooner we know if it's either the IBD or cancer, the better chance we have.

Real good news is that the blood in her waste isn't affecting her--yet.  It's just there.  We need to find out what's causing it, though.  But for the moment, she's okay.

So then we were heading into Sandy to run some errands (was supposed to go to Dinosaur today, maybe another time *sad face*) and I plugged in the car charger for my phone.  Instantly the air smelled like bad electrical burned smell--you know the odor.  Blew out my phone charger somehow, but thankfully not the outlet in Turbo.  Good thing I was on my way to get another one!

Oh, did I mention the foot long crack in my windshield?  It's the weirdest one I've ever seen because the crack is actually flaking.  Flaking?  Time for a new windshield.

Is it bedtime yet?

Blood Moon

I decided to experiment this morning.  I'm a little disappointed with the results but think it was definitely worth crawling out of my nice, warm bed at 2 am to go lie down on the grass in the back yard  on a warm spring night (in April!?) and play with the ISO setting on my Oly.  I will, however, do some research before the next lunar eclipse to see if I can take better, clearer photos.  I also figured out this afternoon how to work the tripod.  That should help more.  *wry chuckle*

Hey, be kind to me.  I'm still a beginner when it comes to playing with settings on something other than point-and shoot cameras!

 I am pretty exhausted, though.  Didn't sleep much when I came back inside.  The kitties decided they needed to snuggle.  Zoey was up against my tummy and Keeks was on my face.


14 April 2014


My wifi is down tonight.  How annoying.  Thought I would try a post from my phone. Meh.  Even with swype, I prefer a real keyboard to type on. *sigh*

Hey, i just figured something out.  It is said that when a person can't sleep is because they're in someone else's dreams. Maybe that's why some people can't sleep... They're in my dreams.

Back to Farm Heroes on the phone.

Spring Break!

It's Spring Break in Utah this week!  Yahoo!!!!

Well, at least that's what the Caboose is thinking.  He wanted to go night boarding tonight but Brighton stopped night skiing on Saturday.  Bummer.

We talked about heading down to the Four Corners region for a couple days, he wants to play Four Square there.  Silly kid.  I also want to go to Mesa Verde though I'm sure the boys (he wanted Red to go with us) would be bored there.  I nixed that idea after what happened with Zoey this past weekend.  She's on medication and it's a little challenging to give it to her so....

We're planning a day trip to Dinosaur National Monument in the next few days.  *shrug*  Oh well.  At least it's going somewhere.

I wonder if the Spiral Jetty is reachable.

Or maybe G2 and I could finally hike to the top of Ensign Peak.  Maybe the Caboose would want to go.

I really want to head down to the Grand Canyon.

So many options for Spring Break.  But with a kitty that may or may not be sick, we just get to do a day trip.  That's better than nothing.